One of my least favorite phrases of all time is "you'll understand when you're older." This simple phrase implies immaturity and underdevelopment, as if life is just too vast for a small-minded 14-year-old to understand. Although the phrase is not necessarily untrue, it can be an insult. As I described last week, everyone has different backgrounds and stories that shape their perspective...so how is it fair to assume you know everything about everyone's maturity and understanding based on age?
Being underestimated for age is frustrating. As a 17-year-old, I often hear one of two phrases from adults:
1. You're basically an adult! Life is hard, you need to learn how to handle situations like this, it only gets harder from here.
2. You couldn't understand, you're just impossibly too young. You'll understand when you're older.
I don't think adults understand how confusing this is. Am I a mature adult who needs to do everything independently, or am I a childish, immature teenager who can't participate in complex adult activities? And how could you possibly know my level of maturity?
Do not judge age. Do not underestimate the power experience has on age. Seventeen could mean vacations yearly and successful parents with connections. Seventeen could mean parental death and societal rejection. How can we possibly compare maturity by a number. We can't.
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